Again! Beto Armadillo Silverhouse is the Ginger of the month for April, due to lack of reccomendations for gingers of the month, he is by default April's ginger of the month.
In order to help fight the spread of hateful crimes such as bullying due to gingerism we are now going to celebrate the "Ginger of the Month" Beto Armadillo Silverhouse is the ginger of the month of February. Recognize a ginger for being a redghead today, either encourage them, or bully them, just make them feel seen.
Although the inaugural football season was delayed due to the crashed computer system, the video game "College Football" now features the Southeast Wyoming State Beavers. The creators of the game said that, even though they weren't playing in the 2024/25 season, they couldn't wait to put such a great school in. The Beavers were planned to be put in earlier, and it was recently announced that they would be added regardless of their team status. Students, alumni, faculty, and fans are encouraged to get the game and post a picture of them playing #SEWSUCollegeFootball.
The Inaugural DII SEWSU season has been rescheduled to next year as they had to turn down thousands of offers from NFL athletes who wanted a shot at playing at the college they had always dreamed of but never could as SEWSU had not officially created a football team. JJ McCarthy, the upcoming QB for the Vikings and former QB for the University of Michigan said, "Now I wish I could go back and be a super senior. I could have transferred to SEWSU and finally fulfilled my lifelong dream of being the QB for the Beavers. They're so much cooler than being a Wolverine." The influx of applications crashed the computer system for the Athletics Department. Dean of Students, Jandrew Aackson announced that the Inaugural season would be re-postponed for the 2025-26 season, and they would be working on a roster for the season. Tech support volunteers needed.
Recently, an influential member of the community, Mr Carson Quam celebrated his 13th birthday by donating a fantastic number of informational texts. Thousands of books with many much words were contained in the donation of historic proportions. Titles including Look Before You Leap by Kermit the Frog, and The demon in The Freezer by Richard Preston were included in the gift. Happy Birthday Carson!
Beavy the Beaver Found Murdered by Rival Lancers!
New mascot Beavy Jr to make first public appearance at alot-touple header
Beavy Jr
The search for beloved mascot Beavy the Beaver ended sadly after he was found murdered in a ditch near the rival Eastern Wyoming College campus. All students are welcome to see the school counselors or skip class to mourn and recover, as there will be no homework or tests until after the funeral. Beavy was the school's mascot for decades before he was discovered missing on Tuesday, April 23. School officials met with detectives from the school paper The Monthly Beaver who said they had good reason to believe he may have been kidnapped. Search parties looked for days without any clues until a police report was discovered from Torrington, Wyoming stating a dead body was found just outside the EWC campus. Investigations are still ongoing, but police and SEWSU officials have determined a prime suspect in a student-led organization called The SEWSU Haters. Their self-proclaimed goal is simply to "destroy the rivals and everything they love." The state of Wyoming has declared them a possible terrorist group and a threat to safety. Authorities have not ruled out the possibility of support or even funding from EWC officials for this attack and have included the idea as part of the investigation. The funeral for Beavy will be held this Saturday, May 4 at the new football stadium (visitation 9am-4pm, service 4pm). All current students and staff are expected to be there and alumni, past staff, parents, and fans are encouraged to attend, and it shouldn't be too crowded because of the location. New mascot Beavy Jr (full name Beavy the Beaver Jr) has been officially named SEWSU's new mascot and will make his first appearance at the annual alot-touple header against, fittingly, the Eastern Wyoming College Lancers. This will be an especially heated competition considering recent events and we ask that you show up to at least half the games to watch our top-tier sports teams beat the crap out of them just like last year (but this year at home). If you can make it to all the games that would be amazing, but because there are over 15 games to go to, some hours long, we just hope you are at half. Beavy Jr will make his first appearance at a ceremony just before the first game of the series. He will be wearing the home football jersey for next year and will change out jerseys occasionally depending on the game. This will be a little different than many are used to, as Beavy Sr simply wore his iconic orange jersey with a B even after the color became outdated for SEWSU. We feel this is a good step as multiple students over the years have requested that his jersey be changed.
Beavy the Beaver Missing!
SEWSU mascot Beavy the Beaver has been reported missing as of Tuesday, April 23. He was last seen walking near the new football stadium. The Monthly Beaver detective journalists say there is reason to suspect he may have been kidnapped. A search party will be sent out later tonight. If you have any information relating to his disappearance, contact school authorities immediately. More information will be released tomorrow about the results of the search party or other leads via this site and the school Instagram page.
Hockey Rink Groundbreaking April 27
Artist Rendering
The groundbreaking ceremony for the brand-new Thompson Arena will be held on Saturday, April 27. The facility will include a main rink with seating for 5,000, a practice rink, eight locker rooms, and an advanced, state-of-the-art weight room with a turf area for speed and agility training. The DI Inaugural Season will be held in the 2025-26 school year. Get your official jerseys today at the SEWSU bookstore.
ROTC Training Scrimmage
The USMC SEWSU ROTC will be holding a campus-wide scrimmage and 2nd Crucible for all ROTC students. they will be exscused of absences as they will not be sleeping for the next 72 hours and will be given one day to rest and recover following. ROTC students who do not pass this scrimmage or fail to complete will be promptly escorted off campus and will receive a full-ride expulsion from SEWSU
Enrollment for 2024-25 Now Open
For those wishing to get an early jump on applying or enrolling for the 2024-25 school year, registration opened yesterday. To apply, simply go to the admissions tab on the SEWSU website under academics, and fill out the form truthfully to the best of your abilities. Your response will be sent to the school board, who will send you an email saying either you were rejected, or they would like to meet with you at a later date to learn more.
Ginger Day a Success
SEWSU took its part in fighting gingerism on Thursday, April 4 by making orange hair dye available in all dining halls. Thousands of students dyed their hair to support gingers on campus and everywhere. Student Seth Hegg, a ginger, said the effort was "extremely touching", and that this event helped him heal after a gingerist attack following an Instagram post from an UNNAMED STUDENT. Chancellor George McBeaverson stated he was very proud of the way students supported the ginger community, and that gingerism has no place in such a distinguished university as SEWSU.
Gingerism Strikes SEWSU!!
After a recent Instagram post from the SEWSU account, an UNNAMED STUDENT attacked Seth Hegg in Sanchez Hall. As everyone knows, every hair color is the same, including gingers. Next time we hear about gingerism against a student, the one attacking will be executed, as determined by our lawyers. Remember, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything!!!